Pushing the ‘Remove’ Button

When is it ok to delete a Facebook friend? I recently removed 3 people from my Facebook page because I was sick of receiving game invitations. Maybe I was harsh? But I did it. There. A few days later I had a conversation with a friend who wants to delete ME, because I blog. She hates blogs. So, when is it ok to delete a Facebook friend? What is the correct social media etiquette?

There seems to be an unspoken rule that once you’ve clicked that ‘accept’ button there’s no going back. Somehow, if you delete a Facebook friend, you are in some way, removing them in real life. It’s like living life as an adult but having a teenager control your mind whenever you’re on the Internet.

There are lots of people who post things I disagree with or things that irritate me… But I don’t delete them! The reason I don’t is because it’s a big ‘political’ statement and my 15 year old self seems to control me when I’m online! My friend who wants to delete me, hates blogs, she doesn’t hate me.

However, what happens if you do delete someone and then bump into them in the supermarket. Lots of people notice! Then you have to have THAT excruciating conversation. ‘I deleted you because you irritate me’. But that sentence in itself is problematic; I didn’t delete them because they irritate me. I deleted them because their posts irritate me.

Perhaps the way to do it is to warn them? The way you warn a child about the naughty step: ‘If you do that again…’. Or do it and hope they don’t notice? I’ve had my warning, it was a verbal one. So, I’ll be checking my friends list tomorrow to see if I have been deleted, after tagging my blog-hating friend in this post!

IainG, a teenage blogger,(http://learnenglishteens.britishcouncil.org/blogs/iaing) makes an interesting observation and one that my teenage self would never have thought of. He says ‘the answer to the question of deleting friends is quite simple. Friendships are not permanent. Very few relationships really are. Why, then, should Facebook “friendships” be permanent?’

So, how offended would you be if one of your Facebook friends removed you? And what is the correct social media etiquette?

2 thoughts on “Pushing the ‘Remove’ Button

  1. I have to admit I’ve deleted people before… usually when their posts continously irritate me. I also think it’s good to have a real life ‘friend clear out’ from time to time… (relates back to your mood hoovers post) ! Don’t forget I’m pretty sure you can look like you’re still friends with them on facebook but not have to receive any of the posts – everyone wins?!

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  2. Interesting. I have to admit to feeling a bit miffed if I notice someone has deleted me! I find that the good thing about Facebook is that you can manage it to your own ends – so for example, if someone is annoying me with their posts I just hide them from my newsfeed rather than delete them, then if I feel a bit weird about someone in particular seeing a post I’m writing, I just block them from that post. Maybe sneaky but that way I don’t have to offend anyone. And if you hide someone for long enough you kind of have de-friended them – they just don’t know it! I also started a dedicated page for my blog so that I don’t have to irritate all my before-blog friends with constant blog promotions. X

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